That phrase pretty well sums up my whole being. How many times can a person making their way through life, minding their own business, taking care of their own responsibilities, leaving no wake to capsize others be left standing at a catastrophe hopeless and powerless in a sea of lies and deceit? I peacefully went to bed Friday night knowing I had worked my ass off to make sure that I not only protected my ass(ets) but those of my neighbors who I had not even met. Yet Saturday morning I'm being pushed off a proverbial plank.
What do you get for being responsible these days? Being treated as a pariah – like I didn’t know what I was doing. I took every measure of precaution at my disposal to make sure my booth was in compliance. I returned several times during the evening hours to make sure my canopy and gear would survive the night of wind and rains. Yet everyone who represents the Holden Beach Merchants Association has either claimed the incident as “an act of God” or won’t return my phone calls. They should know better because I went much further than their suggestions of how to anchor a booth. The minimum was implied but I implemented the maximum.
My gut feeling is that the guy responsible doesn’t have the insurance that is required to have been able to participate. There are way too many signs pointing in that direction. And the festival representatives know it.
We are broken people. We are all physically sick. Jessie and Ben either hear or sense our worry and fears. It shows in that Jessie spent the afternoon throwing up. Ben has started having seizures again despite the meds. I just have to ask when will we catch a break? Really. Does life have to be this difficult? Do our hearts have to be broken every time things seem to be moving forward?
When does the pain end? I’m guessing once life ends and I’m now wishing that will come quickly. Someone tell me that there is a reward for doing the right thing. That is all we’ve ever been about but doing the right thing just digs that grave deeper and deeper and deeper…
Monday, October 27, 2008